I blame it on the telly

It is quite a challenge to teach our children our Islamic values nowadays, it being a science and technology era and all ( read, television is essential to our lives as the air to breathe ). We constantly have to fight to make our Islamic values heard in the midst of the noise of the telly and games consoles.

Last month, my son told me that celebrities do not eat. Celebrities ? “ Yes, ”said Abang. “ They cannot eat. Why ? ” Excactly, why ? Apparently he got it from Mrs Fosters Home for Imaginary Friend, and Blue, the fiendish blue coloured imaginary friend became a celebrity and was refused food. Okay, how do I explain this to him ? Especially since I keep teasing how chubby he looks and he absolutely loved it. He would laugh delightedly when I called him fat. Would he still laugh when I explained that celebrities have this stupid notion that stick thin is beautiful and therefore starve themselves to look good ? How can I explain while not turning him into a 7 year old anorexic ?

Then on Tuesday I was preparing for work and since there is no school, Abang and Adik was perched on our bed watching cartoons after our Subuh prayer. When I put on my top, Abang asked, “ Why are you wearing that Mum ? Are you going to work ? ” After Adik asking me to change my clothes the other day, I was rather indignant. “ Excuse me, this is a long sleeved baju, okay. ”

“ No Mummy, it looks like a Chinese baju…” He said. True enough, it is a pink cheongsam inspired blouse. “ Yes it is and it is okay for work…, ” I said, thinking how critical can my children get. ZAdik all the while was too absorbed with the cartoon and was not giving us any heed. My son then gave me his lovely grin that I love so much and said, “ You look nice Mummy…” nodding his head happily. I beamed at him before he added, “ Nice and sexy…”. My smile faded but my son was still nodding his approval.

“ What is sexy, baby ? ” I asked cautiously, not really sure that I want to hear his explaination. He pondered for awhile before saying “ It means pretty…” I went to him and said, “ No it is not. You have to be careful with the words you use because it could come out wrongly..” At that his face fell. “ I am sorry Mummy….” He said. My face went a few degrees lower. He was so happy just now, proudly thinking that he had done the right thing and here came his awful Mummy pulling him straight down into the dumps. I smiled again, kissed him and thanked him for the compliment he so generously bestowed upon me.

Then yesterday at dawn, I was rushing to buka puasa, sembahyang Maghrib and organizing my kids for prayers. Babah went to play football straight from work. The three of us prayed and at the end when it is time for doa, Abang was hesitant. “ Mum, do I have to doa ? ” he asked. I looked at him, my palms already upwards, ready to seek forgiveness from my Maker. “ You don’t need anything ? ” I asked. “ Well, my exams dah habis….” I sighed. Maybe it is too much to ask from a 7 year old.

Since I was born with a funny bone and a serial teaser from small, I mischievously asked, “ You do not want to ask for a bike or anything then ? ” My face smiley and playful. He sat down again, contemplated for a while then said, “ It is okay lah Mummy. I will ask for a bike when I next see a wishing star…………” Ternganga lah emak yang Melayu ni. He either got it from the telly or from his Enid Blyton… Payah….

A crowded arts class

Amir and Alesya ( my niece from my eldest brother ) decided to join Abang and Adik’s art class. Mummy reminded everybody that it starts at 11.30 am and described the location. Apparently she gave the right location to Ibu Amir and the wrong one to Ibu Alesya. Alesya ended up going to another art school for half an hour before joining Abang, Adik and now Amir.

The boys sat together at the front and the girls together at the back. Amelia observed that the girls were socializing with each other, talking and admiring each other’s work. The boys though were quiet. As we sat looking at the boys, Abang and Amir were quietly regarding each other. No smiles exchanged what-so-ever, just looking. Probably they were just sizing each other up…

Aiman, Rafidah’s daughter was also there. He had started the class much earlier and was already a pro. Ibu Amir and Mummy went to him to say hello and squeezed his cheeks. As we were leaving him, Mummy saw Abang talking to him. And when we returned to the sofa, he had already joined Abang and Amir’s table.

“ Look Mum… “ said Abang excitedly, “ 6 years old, 5 years old and 7 years old “.

Mummy laughed. She laughed harder when Abang, Amir and Aiman were silently checking each other up. Apa hal ?

-

Anyway, the girls were realky whiny. " Teacher, I want to paint !! " " Teacher, mine is not pretty .. " or " Teacher, let me do it.. " Tecaher this and teacher that. Coupled with Yana ( Alesya's sister ) cryings, the teacher had had enough. " Aiyoo.... don't call teacher so much aaa... teacher is going crazy already..... ".

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Waa ha ha ha ha... !!

Go change Mum !!

This morning too as usual Adik watched the telly as I prepared myself for work. I was putting on a sleeveless number when Adik called me.

Mummy : Yes ?

Adik : Why are you wearing that ?

Mummy : What ?

Adik : Are you going to sleep, Mummy ?

Mummy : No, I am going to work.

Adik : Mum… that baju is not for work. Go change, Mum.

It must be my sleeveless shirt. So I put on my cardigan, and gave a little twirl. She beamed.

Adik : That is better, Mum.

To test her theory, I kissed her goodbye, took my keys and headed for the door. She screamed.

Adik : Mummy !! Your kepala !!!

Ha ha… I snapped up my tudung and blew her a kiss.

Mummy : See you later, alligator.

Adik : In a while, croco-dial.

Adik’s Piano Class

After much pleading and whining on Adik’s part and asking and enquiring on mine, Juliette, the lovely and very helpful administrator of the music school, found a piano teacher willing to teach my 3 and a half, unschooled daughter. Last Saturday was her first class.

On the way to class, I asked her many, many times if this is what she really wants. Her eyes were glazed when she said, “ Yes, sure… “. Hmmm….. When we got there, 30 minutes early as usual, her teacher Dahlia was not there yet. At 10.30 Abang went to his class and it was just Adik and I waiting at the corridor.

Then I saw a girl peeking at us from the lobby. I looked at her and resumed my reading. Then I saw her peeking at us again and started hesitantly at us. “ Are you Abang's mother ? “ She asked. I said yes and she said she is Dahlia, Abang’s sister’s teacher.

I took a good look at her. She is still a baby herself, fresh from school and oh so cute. I like it. From her kind face and demeanour, I know she will be patient with my daughter.

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“ She really wants this. She has been pestering me and I asked Juliette and she said too young until last month she said she found someone who is willing to try, “ said I. She smiled and told me not to worry.

She took Adik’s hand and led her to Studio 5. When the door closed, I fidgeted. I heard her talking to Adik and Adik answering back. I resisted the urge to peek at the little window.

Then I heard the key being pressed and another and another. I looked. She was teaching Adik the fingering. I went back to my bench and waited. I do not know for what, but I just waited. Then I suddenly heard Twinkle Twinkle Little Star being played. Uh – uh. I peeked again and heard my daughter happily singing. Adik usually pretended playing that song on the piano. I just knew she asked the teacher to play it for her.

When I looked again, Dahlia was showing Adik the C-key. She in turn pointed at the A on the piano lid that spelt the piano's maker and said that is an A. Dahlia had to cover the letterings with her hand. I ran.

Abang came out of the class and eagerly asked about his sister. We then waited. When they finally came out, they were holding hands. Adik had a happy look on her face and Dahlia a more cautious one. I was wavering from disappointment and hopeful.

Dahlia : She is small, it will take a long time to teach her.. But she is cute and adorable… ( and squeezed Adik’s cheek ).

Me : I know. But she wanted it so much I just had to ask. Juliette did ask me to join in the Junior Music Class but I can’t because my son has a class at that time.

Dahlia : Yeah, that programme is very good. It is really going to be very slow with her. She needs a fun class with a lot of music. Let me give you the book…

Me : I know it will take long. I have no expectations. I am just happy that somebody is willing to teach, that is all.

She smiled. I like her. When I wanted to pay for Adik’s fees, Juliette said she would talk to Dahlia first. Aaa….. I want to pay because when money is exchanged everything is already assured. I do not want to go next week, my little girl all happy and then, they changed their minds… Waaa………….

I know she is expecting to go back to her music class next week. Hmmm….Like her art class. Adik enjoys her arts class. she would wake up excited every Saturday morning. Even Ivy got caught up with Adik’s enthusiasm. “ Your daughter aaaa is so cute. She is very interested in painting. Using crayons aaa she is okay only but when painting aaa, aiyoo… she would go hahaha and hohoho while she paints.

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When I apologized for not sending Umar to her on Tuesdays for extra Mandarin, she told me it is fine. Whenever I am ready, she said. Then she added, “ Start next year also can. Maybe Adik can join in Mandarin together lah with Abang…. “. You want to teach my daughter Mandarin, I asked. I was shocked because Adik is certainly a handful. “ Yesss….. She is cute lah. Aiyaa… so fun to have her … “ she said. Really aaaa ? You don’t get rimas aaa when she calls you all the time ?

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" Okaylah Ivy... Thank you. "

Abang's Sembahyang Camp

Yesterday we had a missive from Abang’s school. Babah who read it said tomorrow ( today le tuh ) is Solat Camp. Students were advised to wear slippers and songkok ( for boys ) and bring a small bag with 2 fresh writing books, pencil case and colour pencils. I did not read the memo. I relied on my husband for the information. So this morning Abang went to school in his baju PJ ( Thursday is his PJ ), songkok and slippers, carrying a small bag with all the stuffs.

I car-pooled with Babah today so this morning after a long time, I sent my boy to school. As we walked to the school compound, I noticed all boys were dressed in their usual uniform. None wore slippers or have a songkok on their head. Oh – oh. When I told Babah about it, he panicked. “ Takpe lah, “ Said I, “ Let’s see how he handles the situation….. ".

My conversation with Abang, en-route to school, was of course focused on his sembahyang etiquette. I lectured on how important for him to sembahyang correctly and therefore have to pay real attention to what his Babah was doing when we pray together and how embarrassed I would be if his teacher tested him and he failed. “ He would think that we are a family of irreverents. “

He gave his customary “ Yes Mummy “ and “ I know Mum “ and “ Okay, Mummy “.

By 1 pm, Babah called me up to ask me to give his son a call. “ I just want to check if he dressed correctly to school and if he was in trouble… “. Okay.

Abang : Hai Mummy.

Mummy : Hai sayang. How was school ?

Abang : Oh hari ni just tulis – tulis je. I got all right Mummy.

Mummy : Really ? That’s nice. Were you in trouble ? Because just now I saw everybody else pakai kasut sekolah and bawak normal bag sekolah.

Abang : Tak de apa – apa pun.

Mummy : So hari ni tak belajar sembahyang ?

Abang : Hari ni ustaz test ambik wuduk. Ustaz nak tengok siapa yang tak tahu.

Mummy : Well… how did you do ?

Abang : Abang Cuma salah dekat kaki ….

Mummy : Itulah. I told you many times about the way you ambik wuduk at your kaki. I told you kan you have to use your hand to sapukan air tu to your kaki…. Blah blah blah. Nag nag nag…

Until I was interrupted by …

Abang : Okay Mum. I love you. Bye ! Toot. Toooot. Tooot…

Cess… he hang up on me….

Tak tahan kena leter lah tu. Dah besarnya anak aku.

An eventful weekend

What a weekend Abang and Adik had. They started with a makan2 at Amir’s house where they played non-stop with the host and later Ayesha. The party broke up at half past midnight.

Then they started early next day too. By 11 am they arrived at Ayesha’s new house and inspected her great new abode. Mummy and Babah liked the breezy and un-hectic neighborhood.

They were joined by Amir at 12 pm and the party proceeded to Lukman and Baby Umar’s house for a visit. Luke ( as per Uncle Sib ) was not around but they played, all 4 of them again. Babah was holding the gorgeous ( and pouty lipped Baby Umar – Hey Umar, Mick Jagger called and wants his lips back !! I tell you even Angelina Jolie pun jealous tengok his stunning lips ! ) Baby Umar when he couldn’t take it any longer. Baby Umar let out excited screams, wanting to join in the game. Aunty Amelia took Baby Umar from Babah and let him join in the play. He was so clever, playing with the big boys and girls.

We left Aunty Jubei’s house around 2.30 pm ( we thought we were going to follow Aunty Kamalia from behind, but when Mummy entered the car, Babah quickly swung the car around and headed home at full speed. Babah needed the toilet which is really typical of him… ).

We rested for awhile before leaving for a birthday party at Pantai Dalam. Nadirah, Babah’s cousin, Uncle Eddie’s daughter, 10th birthday party. We partied and played games again and by 9 pm we slept like a baby… which we still are anyway. Anyway on the way to Nadirah's party, Mummy instructed Adik to present her presants to her, Adik asked in a quiet voice, " What is her name ? " He he..... clever girl, she knows you have to wish somebody a Happy Birthday with the name attached it.

Mummy was pleased. She liked being in a group of people who are fond of each other and not fighting who has the biggest salary, the most important jobs and the cleverest kids. She is tired of that kind of group and she believes being with friends should be relaxing and fun. Not stressed.

There, everybody accepted that each other’s job is important, not measured by the size of their paycheck. They exchanged stories of their jobs and no bragging was involved. Everybody was interested in each other’s work and the stories told.

This circle of friends also accepted that every kid is clever and laughed at each child’s antics and agreed how clever each and everyone of them is. Like how clever of Ayesha thinking her kehidupan is better now that they live in a bigger house or Amir’s clever use of the word either. The moms commented on how clever Ayesha at finishing her plate. We also made a date to take Amir to an Engineering class which he is very interested in. No jealousy here. Everybody genuinely wanted every child to get what he/she wants and to help in any way they could. Each set of parents took a real delight on all the children’s antics, their own or not.

Mummy is really tired of being in a self-important, bragging environment. But how could she get out of it ?

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Adik tattling

“ Mummy… “ Adik whispered. “ My croco-dial is missing … “.

“ Your crocodile ? What crocodile ? “

“ Croco-dial yang kita beli dekat zoo…. “

“ Okay…..”

“ Hannah took it Mum… “ She whispered again, eyes wide.

“ Okay… And then what ? “

“ I told Hannah mum. I told Hannah mummy not allow play with the croco-dial. She doesn’t listen mum.. “

“ Okay…… “

“ She hit the croco-dial on the floor. Dah pecah…. “ She whispered again. All the while she was saying all these, I was thinking how cute could she get ?

“ So whose fault is that ? “ She suddenly straightened her body.

“ Hannah mum. Not Adik fault. “

“ No Adik. If it is your toy, it is always your fault. “

“ Hannah doesn’t listen Mum…… “ She insisted.

“ Okay, that is fine. But if she broke it, it should still be around. Where is it ? “ I asked.

“ Dalam bilik study…. “ she said. She sometimes refers her room as bilik study. I don’t know why.

“ Just now you said it is missing ? “

“ In my room !! “ She said again.

“ Okay, show me…. “

Quiet. Eyes getting bigger.

“ I love you Mum…. “ She hugged me and showered me with kisses.

Hmmm……………. Where did she intend for the conversation to go ?

Art class pulak

I checked out one art class at section 9 on Saturday. Abang is very keen on arts and wants to attend the arts and crafts classes at Klinik Adek every Saturday. His father though thinks that if he is that interested, why not we find him a real class.

There are 2 at that seksyen, both on the same row of shops. I contacted both and chose to visit Ivy’s because they teach Mandarin too. So off we went after piano class. Ivy showed all the drawings her students had done and we sat for the last 20 minutes of her class. Adik and Abang wanted to try and so joined the next class.

Waaa…. My children have no shame, whatsoever. All the children were quiet, except for mine. They keep calling the teacher to come and look at their progress and asked loads of questions. The theme of the day was drawing and colouring the ocean. They have to draw the sun and birds too.

When Ivy was giving them pointers on how to draw the birds, she said, “ Please do not draw the wings to small aaa…. After the birds won’t be able to fly… “. Then my smart-mouth son added, “ Because if the wings are too small, it will not be able to carry the birds. The birds are too heavy….. “. Okay mister. This is not science, it is arts. Mortified, I pretended to look elsewhere.

After awhile, the teacher gasped. My heart skipped a beat. “ Look at this little girl. She drew clouds. Aiiyyaa… I have missed the clouds. Okay everybody, please add a few clouds…. “ she instructed. Abang looked at his sister and beamed, “ Adik, you are so clever…. “. I was again mortified when my daughter said, “ I know…. “ and blinked her eyes dramatically.

After all the colouring with crayons done, Adik’s work is finished. Abang was not though as he has to fill the white space with water colour. Adik gasped when Abang held a paint brush in his hand.

“ Hey, what is the big idea ? Where is my brush ? “

“ No Adik. You are to small to use paint okay ? You use crayons only… “ said the teacher.

I hissed at Adik to come to me. She came, face thunderous. I told her to sit next to me. She sat for a few seconds then went back to her teacher.

“ Teacher, I want to paint.”

“ No.. you cannot aaa…. Because you are too small…. “.

“ Adik, come here and sit with me… “ said me again.

That girl gave me a petulant look and leaned to her teacher, “ Teacher look at my mummy. She keep calling me to sit down… “.

Waa….. geramnya aku. Kalau kat rumah tu memang dah kutil – kutil dah….

Abang is no better. He kept calling the teacher over and giving suggestions on how to make the picture better. Pantang ciikgu tu bergerak tengok students lain, Abang dah panggil. I hissed and hissed for them not to hog the teacher so much until I could feel my tongue splitting in two.

Adik followed the teacher everywhere, telling her about her cousins and her toys. I kept telling her to not bother the Ivy as she has other students, but she ignored me. I fully intended to enroll them in the class as Abang is very interested and I can see Adik benefiting too. But I was afraid Ivy will tell me although she will be thrilled to accept Abang ( under one condition : That he remains quiet during class ) but she cannot teach Adik !

That is why when the class finished, I quickly waved the month’s fees to her. Luckily she accepted. Next week, I am just going to leave them there.
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Japanese class Mummy

Amelia and I enrolled in a Japanese class at UiTM. Our first class was yesterday. We were of course late, as working people are wont to do and was surprised to see a different lecturer from the one we were introduced to on Tuesday during orientation.

This guy was good though as he forced us to practice on each other.

Of course I went home and eagerly demonstrated to my son what I learnt.

“ Hajimameshite ! Watashi wa **** desu. Dozo yoroshiku ! “ and bowed. Abang was delighted. Since he is used to learning a foreign language, he quickly emulated me.

“ Hajimemeshite ( part ni dia salah sikit ) ! Watashi wa Abang desu ! “ but instead of bowing he clasped his hands together like a Buddhist.

Waaaa ha ha… salah he……

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But the sweet thing was when I got home, they were already waiting for me at the door. When I got out of the car, Abang smiled at me and asked " How was your class Mum ? Any good ? "

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I was touched because he cared. " Well yes ! " said I.

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He then asked me to teach him a few phrases, things that I haven't learnt yet.

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" Abang, today was my first class. Of course I don't know how to say that... ".

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" Okay Mum.... but can you ask your teacher next time. I am very curious... "

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He he ... curious..... Good. Keep on being curious and inquisitive. I like that.

Abang, Abang

What a day last Wednesday was. I was taking a leisurely shower when I heard my name called repeatedly. I ignored them because well, as I was saying, it was a leisurely shower. Then I heard Adik calling my name. Again I ignored her. Then there was a sharp knock on the door. Can’t ignore that one… sigh…

I yelled out a “what ?” when I heard Babah’s mom’s voice. I was told to go to school to check up on Abang. Ai ya ya ya ya…

I quickly bathed, put on my work clothes, which I had thankfully, chosen and hanged on the closet door. I then raced to school. On the way there, Babah’s sister called me to inform me of what had happened. During the morning assembly, Abang had inserted a pebble into his nose and that particular pebble had remain lodged inside his nose despite his repeated attempt to take it out.

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. When I called my boss to warn him of my late arrival to work, he laughed. Yup….

Anyway, I went to his class. His teacher showed me the pebble, wrapped in tissue and handed me the doctor’s bill. RM 25 to get a pebble that my son had willingly put in his nostril out.

When he saw me, his face went white. His classmates though were excited and crowded around me, each with their own version of the tale. Abang dared not approach me. Pn Wan shooed them away and my son was pushed to me.

I looked at him and he looked at me. I asked why with just my shoulders, hand gesture and questioning face. No word came out of my mouth. He shrugged and shook his head.

Mum : What was the big idea ?

Abang : Nothing.

Mum : Why did you put it in your nose ?

Abang : I want to shoot it out my nose…. I am sorry Mummy.

Mum : You know, if it had one up further they would have to operate you, you know. You will have scars so huge, you will not be handsome anymore.

Abang : Okay Mum. I am sorry.

Teacher Wan then came to me. According to her, the assembly had not started yet when Abang approached her. He told her there was a pebble in his nose and he couldn’t get out. She was shocked and was quite worried because he had started sneezing. They then took him to the clinic. She said luckily Abang was very calm while the doctor tried to take it out of him, because if he struggled they had to take him to the hospital.

When they asked him why he did it, he said “ Saja nak test… “. Waaa………….

Abang's face was contrite while I was talking to his teacher. I didn’t know what else to say and I left after saying goodbye to Pn Wan and Pn Zalida and thanking them profusely.

I called my husband up to mengadu. He laughed. Lunchtime he called Abang up. Abang refused to talk to him. When he had no choice but to talk to his father, before Babah could say anything, he apologized and then handed the phone to Adik.

He was teased mercilessly from then on. Mercilessly…… he he.

Take it easy, Mum

Abang is so going to write a memoir of his life when he is grown. It will be titled “ My crazy Mummy and I. “ Hmmm…………

On Tuesday Babah had to attend his company dinner. So I took my children out. Abang jumped in the front seat first and Adik whined because she too wants the much coveted seat. Since Abang was there first fairly and squarely, I told Adik she can sit in front on our return home.

I could feel her sulking behind me.

When we get to UiTM café, Adik walked with both her arms folded. I then teased her to get her smiling again. She started crying instead. How can I take a crying child to dinner ?

I turned my family back to the car and tried to make her quiet. All my kind questions were ignored which of course then turned into orders for her to hush and my shooting daggers stares came to naught. I didn’t want to bribe or pujuk because her behavior was unacceptable. I didn’t want her to think that she has the one-upsmanship on me with her cryings.

Then I sent Abang to do the job. He too was unsuccessful. I then asked Abang to get inside the car and I started the ignition. As I sat there in my car with the background of my daughter howling like there is no tomorrow, I was reminded of a time when Abang was younger and started to wail at the supermarket because I refused to buy him something. I did what all parents should do ( according to me and my way of parenting lah. I have to say, it is not for everyone ) wailed a few times louder than him. I stopped at throwing tantrums and rolling on the floor of course, but I did wail and stomped my feet. People looked but I got what I wanted. Abang stopped crying. My antics embarrassed him. Ha ha.. back at ya, my son. Back at ya…

So, I started to scream. My children who rarely hear my raised voice were shocked. Adik stopped crying immediately and looked at me in terror. She then let out a little repressed cry and I started screaming again. Just a healthy ‘Arrgghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !!! ‘.

When I looked at Abang, his eyes were wide and his face.. well was priceless. He came to me and put a reassuring hand on my shoulder. “ Take it easy Mummy. Take it easy, “ he said while rubbing my arms.

When we returned home, Adik was quiet and Abang had a thoughtful look on his face. They went to bed straight away without protests. I left their door ajar so that I could see the going-ons in the room. Abang scrambled to his sister as soon as he thought I had close the door and gave her a hug.

“ Please don’t cry anymore Adik. You know Mummy tak suka, “. Adik gave a teary “ Okay Abang. “.

“ Mummy is old and tired Adik, “ He reminded her. Cess !

“ I’m sorry Abang. “

I let them be. Let them reflect on the happenings of the day as I need to sit down and reflect too.

The next morning, as I was preparing Abang for school, I heard him called my name. When I looked at him, he smiled but with a mature look on his face.

“ Mummy, next time kalau Adik cry, you don’t go crazy okay Mummy ? “

“ Oh? “ said I .

“ Just take it easy Mum… “ was all he said and hugged me.

Hmmm………. So who taught whom a lesson ?

Would he had felt differently about it if I had always been a yeller ?

My men.....

Yesterday morning, I did my Subuh with my son only. Babah was detained somewhere else…( he he read : in the toilet ).

Anyway, of course I was in front. My son is not ready to lead and whenever we pray together we would usually recite the prayers out loud to perfect his reading. As I was about to say my Bismillah, I heard a hoarse voice reciting the Qamat behind me. I was shocked because he did it without me asking him. Usually his Babah would do it, and him stepping in, in his Babah’s absence moved me beyond belief.

I did not turn while he was doing it because I was afraid I would cry. I did anyway. I was weeping with joy. When he finished, I hugged him close and very, very tight. After prayers, I quickly ran to find Babah to tell him of my wonderful experience. As I swung the toilet door open, I saw my husband taking the wuduq. That is the sexiest thing I have ever seen my husband do. He looked so sexy as he bent down and covered his arms with water. When he looked at me questioningly, I just smiled and withdrew.

My men…. What a sentimental day for me.

Adik duduk rumah lagi Bah

Oh kesiannya anak ku Adik. Today as I was preparing for work, Amelia called me up to inform that there was a massive traffic jam that started at Batu 3 tol. Then my husband called me up to inform me of the same thing plus the NPE was also badly congested at Bangsar. Okie dokie. What would a commuter do but wait for the jam to ease up.

I was having a wonderful morning with Adik, colouring, drawing and watching the telly. At 8.50 am I started to iron my tudung. She accompanied me when I did that, chattering away. Then I put on my tudung and resumed watching the telly with her waiting for 9 am to come.

When it came, I bid my goodbye. She hurriedly switched off the telly. I was shocked.

Mum : Why did you switch off the telly ?

Adik : ( Head bowed, looking lost and awkward ) Adik nak ikut Mummy.

Mum : Nak ikut pegi mana sayang? Mummy nak pegi kerja Adik.

Adik : Mummy kan hantar Adik pegi school ?

Aiseh. She said it very quietly and how can I say this… like so full of hope and scared at that the same time. Afraid that I would say no ? She looked sheepish too.

Mum : Adik tak pegi school lagi okay ? Nanti kita cakap dengan Babah lagi ye ?

Adik : Adik nak pegi school, Mum.

I dialed her father’s number.

Mum : Adik cakap dengan Babah okay ?

Adik : With the telephone ? You are calling Babah ?

I nodded.

Mum : Babah… your daughter wishes to speak with you.

Adik : Bah…. Adik duduk rumah lagi Bah. Adik tak pegi school…..

I heard Babah’s voice and then,

Adik : Thank you Bah… Bye !!

Mum : Babah ?

Babah : I told her next week. New month.

Mum : Okay.

The thing that made me pity her more is her demeanour when she switched on the telly. Embarrassed, resigned… I don’t know…

Bukit Jelutong is too far away ?

Yesterday Babah’s parents went to Singapore. Abang was to be sent to Babah’s eldest sister’s house and Adik to Babah’s youngest sister in Bukit Jelutong. As we rushed to prepare, Abang who was sitting next to his sleeping sister said, “ Mum what about Adik ? Do you know Wan is going to Singapore ? “

Mum : Yeah, I know.

Abang : What about Adik Mum ? Wake her up and send her to Aunty Wawa’s house.

Mum : I will be sending her to Aunty Su’s house.

He went quiet. Brows furrowed, he looked at me.

Abang : It is too far away Mum. Send her to Aunty Wawa’s house.

Mum : Tak boleh Abang. Aunty Wawa could not take care that many of you.

I resumed our preparation.

As I ushered him to the door, Babah was carrying his sister. They sat next to each other in front of the door, huddled close.

Abang : Mum, Bukit Jelutong is so far away. Nanti Abang tak tahu what is happening to her.

Mum : Abang… what is going to happen to her ?

Abang : I don’t know. Just anything.

I ran to get my shoes and put Adik’s things in my car.

Abang : Mum, please.

Mum : I have to send her to Bukit Jelutong Abang. Nobody can take care of her at rumah Aunty Wawa.

Abang : I can. I will be there.

Mum : You will be at school Abang. Please Abang....

Abang : Bukit Jeluting is too far away.

Mum : It is still Shah Alam.

I stood there watching him. He looked at Adik who at that time had move to sit across him. He made a face at her. She smiled.

Mum : Give your brother a hug Adik.

Adik : Bye Abang.

His hug was tight.

Abang : Bye Adik…..

As she loosened her hug to withdrew, Abang tried again, “ Mummm……… “. “ Quit it, Abang. ” I said. “ Your sister will be safe. She will be all right. ” I assured him

In the car, Adik was quiet. She suddenly broke her silence as we approached Bukit Jelutong.

Adik : Are we going to rumah Aida ?

Mum : Yes.

Adik : Is it okay Mum ? Can I go to rumah Aida ?

Mum : Yes… I am sending you there. But…. Let’s not make this a habit….

She went quiet.

Mum : Will you be a good girl Adik ?

Adik : Yes Mum.

Mum : Will you listen to Aunty Su ?

Adik : Yes mum.

Then,

Adik : Mum… where is Abang ?

Mum : Abang pegi sekolah.

Adik : Mum…….. nanti lepas sekolah ?

Mum : Abang pergi rumah aunty Wawa.

Adik : Why Abang pegi rumah Aunty Wawa ?

Mum : ( Sighed… not this one too… ) Because Aunty Wawa jaga boys and Aunty Su jaga girls. It’s okay… you can play with Aida kan ?

She didn’t answer.

Attitude grading

Last weekend on our way to Cili Merah before Abang’s piano class, Abang found his old report card from Kindergarten time. He diligently studied it and was making comments on his findings. He however was extra excited about the page on his attitude.

Abang : Mum look !! I get G for everything mom. G is good right ?

Mum : Yes, I suppose so.

Abang : I am friendly, helpful, willing to share… willing tu apa Mum ?

Mum : Willing tu is like you don’t mind doing things. Willing to share means you don’t mind sharing.

Abang : I am so nice kan Mum ? What is independent ?

Mum : Independent means you can do work on your own. You don’t need people to help you.

Abang : That is right. I have always been clever kan Mum ? I always know what to do…

Mum : Yelah tu… Jangan dok perasan sangat. If you need help, never be afraid or embarrass to ask for help. You cannot know everything…

He took his report card with him into the restaurant. As usual, one teh limau suam for me and one teh tarik for my children to share. And as usual they will fight for the bubbles. After one heated argument that made Mummy put her hands on her waist ( woii… apa cekak pinggang dalam bahasa omputih ? ) , lips one straight line, Abang and Adik withdrew. But Abang was not satisfied. He snatched open his report card and showed it to Adik.

Abang : Look Adik, I am willing to share okay ? See ? See ? I will not minum the bubbles sampai habis.

Adik whose ego is the size of watermelons ( that is big considering her itty bitty size ) started to pout. She ate without looking at her brother. Abang’s problem is this, he can’t stand people being angry at him. He wants everybody to love and cherish him all the times. Seriously, Adik’s sulking shouldn’t hurt or disturb him, but it did.

Again he opened his report card.

Abang : Look here. Teacher Devi said I’m friendly. So I want to be friends. Okay Adik ? I’m sorry.

Adik : It’s okay Abang……

Everybody is smiling again. Mummy was mentally writing their blog already.

Missing piece

After Babah’s piano class, at Amelia’s urging we joined Amir at Klinik Adek’s playgroup for a clock making session. It was fun for them, mucking about with scissors, glue and glitter, especially good for Adik as it exposed her to student/teacher relationship ( although it looked like she was ordering the teacher about ) and good for the mammies as they could sit down together for a good chat ( and gossip ).

Amelia showed me a board game that she bought called Make and Break. She assured me of family fun times and so I bought it. She was right. The game was a whole lot of fun. Babah and Abang, the two fiercest competitors fought often. I like to watch my little girl do it though. She was calm, collected, and not at all fuzzed by the ticking clock as she slowly build her blocks. Clever.

And then our tranquillity was shattered by a missing piece. Mummy of course withdrew most privileges until it is found. And being their mum I know which benefit hurt them most, the new playgroup at Klinik Adek.

Adik had a stricken look on her face and Abang sported a thoughtful one when they scurried to look for the piece that can assure the return of their luxuries. He heh…. After a few fruitless searches, Abang conceded defeat. He approached me and apologised profusely for their mistake. Then he started to bargain. The thing that he wanted to keep the most was as I suspected, the novel class.

Every attempt to convince me was not giving him the results that he wanted until he said, “ Mum, I need to learn new crafts !! “ Both Babah and Mummy looked at him enquiringly. Crafts ?

“ I already learnt how to make clocks, now I have to learn other crafts, like stamping or make a mask… It will be very good for me to learn all this… “ he begged. Crafts ? Where did he get that ? Like the other day, I took him to task for being extra bouncy and noisy when he explained that, “ I just want to cheer my sister up !! “ Cheer ?

He had Babah at ‘craft ‘ and so Babah went to look for it but the piece stubbornly remained elusive. Mummy got really tired of seeing her children shuffling about, pretending to look for the now cursed piece, threw her hands up and went down on all fours to locate it. It took her just 2 minutes. 2 whole minutes to find something that her children had tried for hours and for her husband to give up after 15 minutes.

As I held the piece up high triumphantly, I said, “ It takes a woman to do it right. “ Babah looked bored and the children looked relieved. He he…

Neraka

We went to Pizza Hut for dinner yesterday due to popular demand. I sat next to Adik and Abang was with his Babah. Sometime during the meal, Adik dipped her fingers in her drink. Babah sternly told her to quit doing it and I questioned her need to do so.

That night she chose me as the orang jahat. She sat stonily, facing other tables. She decided to un-join herself from her family. Okay, takpa. Garlic bread arrived, no movement. Babah kindly placed one on her plate. She ignored them. Pizza arrived and still not a stir from her. Babah again placed a slice next to her bread.

I then picked up her plate and offered it to Babah. She stared at her plate with a horrified look. Finally some movement. Her face scrunched, eyes narrowed, she finally gave an indication that she was upset. Kalau tidak tadi pretended like she didn’t belong at all.

I put it back and she resumed her indifference. I picked up her plate again and this time she emitted some sound from her mouth. Babah told me to switch places.

As soon as Babah sat next to her, barulah ayaq mata nak bergenang. After a hug and a reassuring cuddle from her Babah, she said she wanted to eat. Oh… But Mummy wanted to create some trouble. I looked at her with narrowed eyes. I kept on staring, my gaze steadily on her.

She looked at me worriedly. She looked away and then landed her eyes on me again and still I kept on looking. “ Bah… mummy is looking at me… “ she complained. Babah gave me an exasperated look which I of course ignored. Then Babah placed the standing menu at a spot where our view of each other is obscured.

“ Thank you Bah, “ she said happily. Then she began to eat.

Okay, takpa Adik… it’s okay.

In the car Babah gave a lecture on neraka and fighting with one’s parents. It worked as when we arrived home, while she was taking off her clogs, she apologized which followed by a hug.

I tucked them into bed. She of course asked me if I wanted to sleep with her. Ohh…. I dengan bangganya said, “ Siapa yang tak nak kawan Mummy tadi ? Marah Mummy, tak nak tengok Mummy… “. I looked at her pointedly. She came to me and whispered, “ I already said sorry Mum. Sudah lah…. Okay ? I said sorry already…. Takpa, takpa kay ? “.

O-kay. I switched on the telly and we settled to watch cartoon. Lucky for me there was a scene that involved a huge roaring fire and therefore took the opportunity to preach about neraka again.

“ Haa.. tengok tu api besar. Macam tulah kat neraka nanti. Kalau orang yang tak hormat mak bapak dia, selalu marah – marah mak bapak dia… masuk neraka macam tu lah… “ I started.

“ Siapa yang naughty mesti masuk neraka. Sapa nak nasuk neraka duduk dengan api besar ? “ I asked.

“ No… I don’t want Mum, “ said Abang. But my little girl… hai…. She said “ It’s okay Mum. I can bring a water gun… “. Apa nak kata ?

-

Tak terkata apa.

-

But I did preach about the futility of water guns in neraka. Coupled with a lof disdain for the contraption. Hope she understands. Please….

This morning

Our morning routine is like this; Babah mandi and Mummy mandikan Abang. Mummy mandi and Babah dresses Abang up. Babah dresses up and organises Abang’s school bag and Mummy takes Abang to breakfast. Babah drives Abang to school, Mummy dresses up for work.

So during my breakfast duty and Babah dressing himself up I would be soaking Abang time alone with me, and of course preparing his bekal.

“ What do you want for recess ? ”.

“ Can I have the icing biscuits ? ” he asked. Sure, no problem.

“ Momm….” He started and I settled down for our breakfast chat. I love this moment because it is just me and him and my concentration is strictly for my darling son. I love seeing him eating the breakfast I prepared while sharing his thoughts, experiences and feelings with me. I love that.

“ Calci-yum kan ( yoghurt ) is good for me kan ? It makes me strong kan ? ” He asked.

“ Sure, the calcium would strengthen your bones… ,”.

“ But kan Hannah kata kan Calci-yum kan kalau makan banyak-banyak boleh buat orang lembik, ”, he said, face full of questions.

“ No, I don’t think so. Do you ever share your Calci-yum with Hannah ? ”

“ Sometimes. ” Was the reply.

“ What does she take to school ? ” I asked, out of curiosity.

“ I don’t know because she sits at the girls’ tables. But mostly money. ” He explained.

“ What do your other friends bring to school ? ”.

“ Money. But they usually beli air saja Mum. And the kan Mum they said kalau makan roti vanilla ( his favourite ) nanti kepala boleh pecah. ” Said he, face scrunched at the absurdity of the tale but terrified at that the same time that it could actually be true.

“ Well, have you ever seen people fall off the table without their heads for eating roti vanilla ? ”

“ Nope…” He said, shaking his head vigorously, relieved that he could still indulge in his favourite confection.

“ You know, maybe the reason why they criticize the food you eat is because you never share…” I gently suggested.

“ No… they always rasa my food, Mum….”

Hmm… okaylah.

We then went to the door to put on his shoes. As I was kissing and cuddling him goodbye, Babah said he had forgotten his watch. So Mummy ran upstairs to for it and stumbled upon a disheveled and still groggy hantu kecik. I swept her off her feet ( heh heh ) and ran back to our men. They were already in the car and as we marched on I asked her to say goodbye with ‘ See you later, alligator ! ‘.

“ Do you know what is an alligator ? ”. She shook her head.

“ Alligator is like crocodile. ” I explained.

“ Crocodile ? No Mum. Crocodile can eat our friends !! ” Was the horrified reply.

Can eat our friends ? Apa tuh ?

-

Anyway after we waved them off ( with Adik screaming to Abang" Say good bye to me Abang ! Say goodbye to me ! " ), I deposited Adik back in her bed, switched on the telly and when I left her she was looking at her books.

-

But when I was done with my morning toilette and went to look for her, she was sound asleep !! Was that a dream ? Did I really held her in my arms just now ?

The siblinghood of Abang and Adik

Scene 1

“ Mum… “ said my daughter when I returned home late Wednesday night. My son was already asleep ( kesian dia and kesian mak dia ). “ Tadi kan Abang marah Memen ( Jazmyn, his cousin ).” Why, I asked. “ Haa… Abang marah Memen because Memen kacau dia. Memen cry, “

“ Really ? “ said I, a bit upset. “ Yes Mum. And then I hug her and say everything is okay… “

She then said in a lowered tone, " Memen kacau Abang Mummy. Remember that, ".

-

Oh okay.. after you ratted on him, you wanna save is arse ? Make up your mind, please...

Scene 2

Last week we were in the car and Abang was being exceptionally active. Babah of course allowed him some time before Babah asked him to stop.

“ But I just want to make Adik laugh," he protested.

“ No, Abang. Be quiet. I can’t concentrate on my driving with you bouncing at the back,"

“ I just want to make my sister laugh, “ he again protested. Then his sister tried to save the day by saying, “ It’s okay Abang. I don’t need to laugh." Ha ha…

Scene 3

Usually Babah and I would tuck our children into their bed and went to sleep happy in the thought of waking up fresh. But as the night went on, we wouldn’t know if anybody would join us and cramp the space.

Anyway, one night we were woken up by the sounds of our daughter crying. “ What is she saying Babah? " I asked sleepily. “ Sounds like where is my Abang," Babah replied also drowsily.

At that I realised there was another person next to me, but shorter with smelly hair ( since Abang is super active, he sweats all the time and therefore I could hardly remember him having nice smelling hair ). “ Oh, Abang is here… “ I said. Babah then went to pick up his little girl to join us. “ Mummy, where is my Abang ?" she asked tearily. I pointed at her brother without looking at her.

“ Abang ! There you are !!" She said as she fell next to me. A minute after that she was already asleep, safe in the thought that her brother is not lost after all.

Scene 4

“ Mum, Adik dropped her books on my nose and it is bleeding," said my son one day, hand cupping his large nose. When I unclasped his hand, sure enough there was blood dripping from one orifice.

Babah was upset. To make things worse, he asked the thing that Adik didn’t like to do under duress, apologise. She can apologise but at her own time, never when forced. Never. She kept her head up high and refused to comply. Babah was understandably upset.

He then made Abang stand in front of his sister and encircled Adik’s hands on his waist. “ Hug and say sorry," Babah commanded. Nope, none doing. Her hands fell listlessly at her side when Babah let them go. Abang looked at his sister with pity.

He hugged her and said in a squeaky voice, his imitation of a girl’s tone. “ Sorry Abang, “ he squeaked. “ Dah Bah. She said sorry already,". Babah looked at him and he dropped the act. He then looked at me to hide his laughing face.

“ Bah, it’s okay. I am not angry. Dia tak sengaja Bah," he said, and led his sister away.

I was lucky that day. Lucky because as I looked in to check on them I saw my little girl looked at her brother who was next to her and said “ Sorry Abang." Abang looked at her and said “ It’s okay, Adik." She then reached for him and gave him a hug, sideways.

Adik punya hal

My daughter really has a smart mouth. Aduiihhh…

As usual, Saturday morning we were at Abang's music school, waiting for him to finish his class. A boy who became Abang’s friend arrived and upon seeing me asked for my son’s whereabouts. He then fired a lot of questions my way and I was struggling to answer and read my paper at the same time.

I do not what was eating my daughter that day. As I was answering the questions, Adik suddenly said, “ Oh.. shut up !! “. Both of us stopped to look at her. He then jumped out and down saying “ Oh… you said a bad word… !! “ over and over again and my daughter keep on answering with “ No. No. No. “.

I didn’t want to interfere mostly because I wanted to see if my little girl can stand up on her own, so I just sat there and watched and so did a few other parents. Adik crossed her arms, face defiant. He gave up after awhile and went to look at the many rows of guitars and picked one up. There is a little guitar for sale there. It is so small Adik could play the guitar while standing up. It was as if it was made for her.

I could see Adik’s horrified face when that boy picked the guitar up. “ That is not yours, “ she said, wagging her finger. He ignored her and began strumming. “ Put it back, “ she instructed and was again ignored.

By that time I had folded my paper and was concentrating on the drama. My daughter must have been really pissed off because she said, “ Go to your class !" That boy… well he put the guitar back at its place and quickly looked for his bag. “ Is my teacher here ?" he asked her. “ Yes," my daughter replied, “ take your bag and go to class…". And he did.

I was dumbstruck. I was about to berate on her rudeness when Abang arrived. I was ushering them out when Abang told me he needed a new theory book. I went back in. Adik and Abang crowded the counter and saw the CCTV monitor there. Adik squealed when she saw herself and Abang. Then the most embarrassing thing happened.

“ There you are Mum ! “ she said. Then she added, “ Oh you are so beautiful !! “ Man…. People who know me know of my tendency to blush. They also know how much I hate it if people compliment me on my appearance ( bukannya apa… Macam Adik cakap lagu tu kuat – kuat kan, org keliling mesti berebut nak tengok lawa mana mak budak ni. Sekali nampak muka aku ni, depa sure kata “ Laa… had ni pun lawa ka ? “ Haa… yang itu yang aku segan sungguh tu…. Aku tak dak perasan lawa punya….. ).

Juliette, the music school’s staff and another parent there were laughing ( I hope not at me but with me ) and cooing at her. Adik then climbed down the chair and loudly said, “ Mum can I go out for awhile ? “. I of course said no and this little girl she put her hands on her waist demanded for a reason with a “ Why not ? “. Her face frowned, looking at me questioningly.

I think all the other parents laughed out loud. I just scrunched my face with mortification. “ Alah, don’t do like that. She is so clever, “ said Juliette. The lady who was sitting at the counter with us looked at Abang and said “ She can speak very well can’t she ?" Abang nodded and said “ Yes, my sister is very funny. “ “ How old is she ? “ She asked. “ Five, “ said I and quickly dragged the little minx away from the crowd. Eee……..